AKA How to use Titles and Honorifics
Hello,
Thank you for taking the time to read this:
Leather places a lot of value on tradition, protocol and hierarchy and so while within our virtual and physical spaces the usage of Titles is
expected by default. The exception being low protocol events like munches, indicated spaces, or where a person indicates they are okay with you not doing so. In these situations Titles are
not appropriate and an alternative address used to avoid drawing vanilla attention or infringing on others boundaries
To us, a Title is something awarded by community to deserving members within it who can be on either side of the slash. Refusing to use Titles while being allowed into our spaces shows a fundamental lack of respect for the wider community by suggesting your personal opinion outweighs the group. A community is a group of people with common goals and values. Not a group of individuals who occupy the same space. An honorific is a personal thing agreed between people within a dynamic and should be used only by those people. For example, "Mistress" would be fine as an honorific. Approaching a femme D-type who has not been covered and calling Her "Mistress" without negotiation is not acceptable. Where a Title is used, the correct address is "[Title X]"
Title/Dynamic Specific
We run most Leather Belt events and spaces (including this site) at Medium Protocol (blending elements of low and High) and also run dedicated High Protocol Events on occasion. During the latter, Titles and more rigorous behavioural standards will be expected at all times
If you are unfamiliar with these behavioural expectations, you are expected to take time prior to any event (or this site) to educate yourself, for example by asking more experienced members of the community.
- For example, “Mistress/Master,” are used as both a Title and an honorific. Approaching a femme D-type who has not been covered and calling Her "Mistress/Master" without negotiation is not acceptable, as this would be use of the term as an honorific. If the same person was Covered (awarded a Title by the community), the correct address would be “Mistress Name”.
- Many terms share this dual application e.g "Sir, Miss, slave, girl/boy etc" if in dynamics. Only the persons involved should be called by the Title alone (as it is being used as an honorific) those outside should say the full Title and name.
Capitalisation and lowercasing of D/s roles is also expected. If you are unfamiliar with this practice, please see resources [LOCATION] for further guidance.
- If a person is a Covered Master (As opposed to Master to a slave as part of a TPE) - They should be addressed as [Master/Mistress Name] regardless of your archetype in the first instance
- Wilful refusal to abide by O/our traditions within O/our spaces will be treated as deliberate disrespect to the individual and the subculture, with appropriate action taken.
If you dislike this practice, you are welcome to find a community m,ore in line with your views
- Do not try to skirt the rules by adding inflections, sarcasm or dismissive gestures such as eye-rolling or mocking gestures when using Titles.
- A good rule of thumb is if someone has a Title in their name, that should be used when talking to them or referring to them. Please don't assume a person without one (including those on the right side of the slash does not want full recognition. Always ask if you are unsure.
- If none of the above apply, you may default to whatever the person indicates is acceptable, provided it does not imply a Title or contradict any of the above
We expect more experienced members to guide less experienced ones compassionately by gently correcting in the first instance. We also expect a "mistake before malice" mindset. if there are special considerations such as race, sex or gender identity, health, personal history etc please remember to communicate Title preferences accordingly and assume the person is misinformed or unaware of these unless they are persistently an issue.[
Default Titles
Mode of address: "Title [Name]"
- Covered: Master (unisex) or Mistress (Femme specific)
- Capped slave: slave (Unisex)
- Leatherperson D-types- Masc: Sir Femme: Miss
- Leatherperson s-types: Masc: boy/pup Femme: girl. Non-binary: Ask
General conduct
- A lot of people mistakenly believe Leather is High Protocol all the time. We'll concede it is generally Medium-protocol in a lot of instances, but this is a relative concept.
Like with anything, Leather varies by group and what is medium protocol to us would be viewed as very high by many others. Something we have noticed within the established Swink/Qwink scene in O/our starting region of Scotland.
- As a show of respect to each other and to O/our community, we do expect a higher acknowledgement of respect and deference to a person's position.
This being said, we are conscious that we are a group based in the UK, where we don't tend to take ourselves too seriously.
- Light jabbing in good humour is welcome, and criticism is encouraged as a vital part of community growth and learning, but please ensure you are showing an appropriate level of respect.
- Courtesy towards all community members is expected, but if you are unsure, it is good practice to approach D-types with slightly more respect.
This does not mean s-types are doormats and can be freely disregarded, mistreated degraded or spoken down to. Respect for hierarchy does not mean a free pass to be a dick. We see people as people first and archetypes second and will remove people found disrespecting anyone based on their archetype
It's confusing at first, and you will make mistakes. We understand that but if you're willing to meet halfway, we're happy to take the time and patience to teach you. Please ask if you're unsure
With thanks to faunt for helping us compile and proofread